THE DEATH OF MR. MIDWEEK SERVICE

We are sorry to announce the passing of Mr. Midweek Service. He died recently at the Neglected Church on Ho-Hum Avenue. Born many years ago in the midst of a great revival, he was strong and healthy. As a child he fed largely on zeal and Bible Study. He grew into world-wide prominence and was one of the most influential members of the Church family.

However, in recent years Mr. Midweek Service has been failing in health, gradually wasting away until rendered helpless by; stiffness of knees, cooling of the heart,  loss of spiritual sensitivity and concern for spiritual things. His last whispered words were inquiring about the strange absence of his loved ones, now so busy in the market place and places of worldly amusement,

Experts, including Dr. Indifference, Dr. Apathy and Dr. Primetime disagree as to the fatal cause of his final illness. They all administered large doses of excuses even ordered a last minute heart bypass, all at no avail. A post-mortem examination showed that a deficiency of regular spiritual food, a lack of prayer and Christian fellowship, all contributed to his untimely death.

We have also been informed that his wife, Mrs. Sunday Evening Service, has just been admitted to the local hospital. Preliminary indications from Dr. Unconcerned state the diagnosis as similar to her husbands. It appears at this point to be terminal. Let's all continue to pray for her.

(Adapted) Mike Bentley